We do have a lot of articles on ST that relate to sex and readiness, as well as one on abstinence/celibacy (I'll link them for you in a second.) What becomes difficult when people have sliding scales of what they do and don't consider sex, then protection against STIs and pregnancy is often not taken into account. If someone decides to hold off on just intercourse before marriage, they would need to be aware that unprotected oral sex can spread STIs just as easily, and unprotected anal sex can result in pregnacy. The people you've been talking with may not be taking that into account, because anything that isn't intercourse isn't 'sex' but it does have the same repercussions that sex can have cheap sex toys, right?.
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